November 23, 2005

Everybody Must Get Socks

I think I need to buy some sock stocks, because it seems like everyone needs them all the time. What does so and so need for Christmas? Socks. Do you know if they prefer thick or dress socks. Both socks. Two socks of both kinds. I mean, many sets of both kinds of socks.

Socks were up by 30% last week when makers had to up their production.

"It's like, for everyone person that exists, they need like, all these pairs of socks," said Mike Knickers of Lottsa Socksas.

Maybe Bob Dylan could rewrite Rainy Day Woman #12 and 35. It could go something like this:

Well, you'll wear them when you're running down the street
You'll wear them when you've got someone to meet
You'll wear them when you're in the bed and snore
You'll wear them even when you feel so poor
But I would not wear them all alone
Everybody must get socks

Ok, has everyone had enough? This is really funny to me right now, so it socks, I mean, sucks for you, doesn't it?

Speaking of socks... I mean, doesn't anyone get them throughout the year? Does everyone just wait until Christmas to decide that they need them? You could be asking for DVDs, high def. TVs, fruit baskets and video games, but no, you just want socks.

And I'll admit it right here on the all night highway -- I want socks, too. I want them so bad. Although I'm tempted to bust out into She's So Heavy by The Beatles, I'll spare you. You probably have pies to bake, potatoes to mash, and socks to knit.


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