Foot Binding, Corsets - Yeah, Kind of Like That

We can discuss the impracticalities of women's clothing all we like, but in the meantime, one or more of the following may occur:

1. The ruffles on our poet shirts float, from six feet away, onto a glowing candle wick and catch us on fire
2. Modern shoes decide to throw caution to the wind and just present what they've wanted to all along: the reintroduction of foot binding
3. Because of what they really are now, "shorts" become obsolete and are replaced by the word, "wedgies"
4. Size charts, which breakdown the sizes S, M, L with ranges of measurements in inches and centimeters, add columns in between that say "Out of Proportion People See Here" or
5. Pants become legwarmers because they no longer have a waist at all as in "at waist" "just below the waist" and "ultra low waist"