May 10, 2005

Airhead Moment

Last night we were watching David Letterman. Mike Smith, the winning jockey for Giacomo, who won the Kentucky Derby this past weekend, (in case anyone has been living inside of a noodle the past few days) read off the "Top Ten Tips for Winning the Kentucky Derby". Number One was "It helps if Jose Canseco is your trainer".

Now, I know enough about baseball to know that Jose Canseco is the infamous player in the middle, and/or the instigator of, the most recent steroid use accusations within the world of baseball. The following will show that I also know just enough about horse races to make a donkey's ass out of myself.

So, with an I'm-going-to-show-that-David-Letterman-something attitude, I turn to my husband and say, "But what use are steroids to jockeys? They're supposed to be short and lightweight."

...Before he could finish saying with a shit-eating-grin, "Honey - they're talking about the horses" I realized the embarrassing reality of my comment and was doubled over in awe at the ridiculous way my brain functions (or doesn't) sometimes.

This is a true anecdote and if it wasn't so contradictory to do so, I would spend two hours a day, on the corner, repeating over and over again, "think before you speak".


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