May 12, 2005

Bangor, Maine Offended by Flight Diversions

After yet another flight was diverted to Bangor, Maine when the FBI found a no-fly guy on a plane in mid-air from Paris to Boston, officials from the city issued the following statement:

"When you divert flight after flight here, to the beautiful city of Bangor, you're basically saying to all of us here that we have so little to offer that there's not even a single terrorist in the world that would gain anything from landing here. We're not that boring you know. We have a lot of really, really nice people up here and you know, haven't you thought that terrorists might have a "Operation Get the Nice People of Bangor, Maine" plan somewhere in one of those hard drives?"

Other people in Bangor are pissed because the FAA makes them pay for hotels and food for all the passengers of the diverted flights. One owner of a Denny's restaurant which is connected to a Howard Johnson's said Thursday, "Has anyone involved with Homeland Security, the FAA, the FBI or the other mega-bureaus thought about possibly, just maybe, not letting these planes get off the ground in the first place? What's the point of the no-fly list if it doesn't keep the people from getting into the air to begin with?"

These points were briefly considered by the FBI and FAA, then dismissed as being way too involved and costly.


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